I Really Wanted A Girl


Written by Luke Woodhouse | Blended Parent Network

 

I really wanted a girl…

Currently having two boys is amazing, we had several long chats about potentially trying for a third and after many, many chats we decided to go for it.

From the second we found out Fiona was pregnant, I said how awesome it would be to have a girl. Having two boys already I felt it would just complete the family. Fiona said from the first day “it’s a boy” there was zero doubt in her mind. My first hunch was girl and I was sticking by it!!!
The 12 week scan passed by, baby all healthy things becoming a bit more real. I would be in the clothes shops looking at the girls clothes imagining singing Disney songs with this long haired, pretty little girl. I ignored the boys clothes.
The big day arrived, the 20 week scan. Hundreds of conversations about potential girl names and boy names (I wasn’t listening to the boy names) the world stopped for a few minutes. The lady doing the scan seemed to take forever I was so focused on finding out the gender, everything she was saying about baby wasn’t even going in. She spent ages looking at the baby’s heart and it was at this moment my focus shifted. What the hell am I thinking????!!!!! This is a baby, the sex is irrelevant. We didn’t want a third just so we could maybe have a girl.
Everything was fine and the third leg was present. First thing I said was “quel surprise” and let out a laugh/long breath. I was a bit gutted, I won’t lie but I was so happy things were ok with baby. I was in denial, I had convinced myself it was going to be a girl. Knowing now that it’s a boy, it’s like I’ve found out Fiona is pregnant all over again. I’m excited again. I got myself so focused on something that was never an actual certainty.
It’s like I’ve had to grieve over the fact I won’t be having a girl. I guess never say never. A few days have passed and I actually feel much clearer, I have a new amazing focus. A beautiful little boy to enter our family in the summer, I best get the washing machine loaded with all the old boys clothes and throw out the frozen headbands I had hidden in the cupboard…..
Three boys, three little smelly boys!!

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