Life Changes 2

Written by Jo Cooksey | First Time Valley Mam

Why do things have to  change? 

As a small child your used to no school, spending all your time with the people who look after you, then you start school and for the next 8 years you spend most days with the same group of friends. 

Then at 11 you change again, you make new friends and that’s it for the next 6 years. Sometimes your group of friends change . Then you either go to college or start work when there’s more changes, more friends, you may keep in touch with those from school but those from age 3 are most probably long forgotten. 

Friendships that form in college or uni are good until you start work then again those friendships frizzle out as you have different views and your priorities change. You may have some friends who by this time have children, they can’t lead the party lifestyle that they used to, friendship fizzle out, but that’s ok because you have your work friends now. 

Then you find a partner, and have children, things change again. The friends not only from 3 are well and truely forgotten so are the ones from aged 11. You hit baby groups and make some friends, spend the next 3 years with some lovely people but are they friends? Really? For those 3 years they are your ears when you want to moan, your drinking buddies when you want a night out. 


Then school. Your child starts school. What do you do now? You have no where to be, no groups to attend. For the first year children maybe on different shifts, afternoons, morning. That’s when you realise that parent hood can be a lonely place. At this point the friends from college days and uni days all have their own lives. 

Wonder how many parents out there are actually lonely? How many friendships have been lost ? What would be the reasons? New babies? New partners? Different parenting expectations? New jobs ? 

Think In the last 3 years I may have lost a few to most if not all of these reasons. Are all parenting journeys like this or just me? Does being a parent of a child with additional needs frighten people off? Is having a child ‘different’ to what they should be the reason? Or Maybe it’s just me! 

Written by Jo Cooksey | First Time Valley Mam

Website | FirstTimeValleyMam

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2 thoughts on “Life Changes

  • Ryan Jon Warren

    My friends that are closest to me or that I value the time of just now are not the friends I needed when I was 18. People learn, grow and develop.

    I’m kinda glad my kids give me an opportunity to meet new people. People are scared of what they don’t understand or what they cannot control. Their loss because these are the things in life that shape who we are.